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Are You Obligated to go to a “Destination Wedding?”
By JLP | June 12, 2006
According to Michelle Singletary in her column You’ll Never Get Rich by Seeing Them Hitched (I love the title), “destination weddings” are becoming more popular. The problem is that it is expensive to pack up a family and head to the Caribbean and many people are simply saying “no” to such weddings. Of course, not all brides and grooms are understanding. Anyway, I like Michelle’s advice: don’t go if you can’t afford it and you shouldn’t be ashamed if you can’t go. I have grown to like and respect Michelle’s common sense over the last year or so that I have been reading her columns.
One thing that bugs me is the fact that the average wedding now costs over $25,000! That’s totally nuts. Of course that number could be a complete scam, spoon fed to us by the wedding industry with its army of wedding planners. I’m sure there are daughters all over the U. S. telling their parents that the average wedding now costs over $25,000! Okay, maybe I’m being a bit cynical.
Topics: Budgeting | 8 Comments »
June 13th, 2006 at 7:03 am
I’d say you are obligated to go if you are the maid of honor and there are no other attendants, especially if the bride asked you on Christmas Eve as you were taking her to the airport before she even knew they were going to have a destination wedding.
Yep. That’s why I’m headed to Puerto Rico in 3 weeks.
I could have said no, but how could I say no?
June 13th, 2006 at 10:10 am
Oh. I should also say that the bride has already told the guests no gifts. They both had their own homes before marriage so they don’t really need much else in terms of registry items.
I think if you’re not in the wedding party, then don’t go if you can’t afford it. Miserly Bastard has some really great posts on attending weddings.
I only felt compelled because I’m the maid of honor. If I was a simple guest. I’d probably not go.
June 13th, 2006 at 12:15 pm
Some couples actually throw destination weddings in order to KEEP the guest list down – so I wouldn’t feel bad at all!
June 13th, 2006 at 3:31 pm
Are You Obligated to go to a “Destination Wedding? Three words: Hey Ell No
June 13th, 2006 at 3:32 pm
Unless of course, you are the one getting married. Then it is Hey Ell Yes!
June 14th, 2006 at 8:44 pm
Not to mention using your precious vacation days to attend someone’s wedding. The whole concept is rather selfish. “Hey, I’m getting married, so why don’t you take a few days off, spend a few hundred on plane tickets and another several hundred to stay at our predesignated hotel.”
July 1st, 2006 at 12:56 pm
My niece is getting married this summer at a destination wedding that is 16 hours away. Everyone has to pay to go and the least expensive way I have found for us to go is $2,000 at least, for our family of 4. To top it off, my mom has cancer and this puts her in a most difficult position.
To me, if you are wanting a destination wedding, then you should expect no one but your IMMEDIATE family and those in the wedding to come and you should be prepared to pay their way. To expect everyone to take vacation time and money is ridiculous and very selfish and inconsiderate of all involved.
November 22nd, 2010 at 1:26 am
wedding planners that are very committed to their jobs are very hard to find `”"