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A Sad Sight
By JLP | September 4, 2008
This morning as I was taking my daughter to pre-school, we passed an apartment complex. In front of the complex was a woman and her little daughter waiting for the school bus. I assumed this because the woman was dressed in a bathrobe and the little girl had on a backpack.
What was sad to me was that it was 8:25 AM and school starts at 8:25 AM! Yet, this woman is standing outside looking for the bus. Sure, it’s possible the bus was running late, but I doubt it. It’s also possible that this is an isolated incident and that this mom is just having a bad day. All I know is that school started last week and this lady’s daughter is already going to be tardy.
Why is this sad? Because it shows just how unimportant school is to some parents. I mean how can this little girl be expected to take school seriously if her mother can’t get her on the school bus? And, this lady’s not the only one. Last year I had to drop something off at my son’s school. I got there at 8:40 in the morning (15 minutes after the start of school) and noticed that there was a (long) line of kids standing at the tardy window. There was no reason for this other than their parents just couldn’t get them to school on time.
I wonder if they have this same problem in China or Japan?
UPDATE: Wow! Readers of this blog did not like this post one bit. In hindsight I probably should have kept my thoughts to myself. Even my wife thinks I was a little harsh.
Topics: Miscellaneous |
September 4th, 2008 at 11:22 am
Come on…give her a break. I don’t think this demonstrates that school isn’t important to the lady. People screw up. People do dumb things sometimes. But you can’t define how important education is to someone based on driving by them one morning.
If you see it happening over and over again…then I think you’re right on the money. But until then…hold off your judgement.
September 4th, 2008 at 11:56 am
Yeah, I really think you’re reading a little too much into this.
Okay, IF education is unimportant to any parent, it’s a bad thing, you’re right, sure. But you don’t know that to be the case with this particular mom, and your case for why you’re making this assumption is very weak.
September 4th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
James is right. You judged way to quickly here.
September 4th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
James, Liz, and Patrick,
Maybe I did judge quickly. But, I can tell you that my kids have been going to school for 8 years now and they were NEVER late.
September 4th, 2008 at 12:34 pm
Maybe her car broke down the night before and she had set up a ride to pick the child up, but the ride was late. Maybe she is divorced and her ex-husband was supposed to come pick the child up and was late. Who knows?
You know, I was willing to keep reading after the “food stamps” incident, even though it was way out of line. But this is twice in the last few weeks that I’ve read something on this purported personal finance site that was a huge waste of mine and everyone else’s time. Good luck to you going forward. Grow up.
September 4th, 2008 at 12:40 pm
I don’t know.
My parents were chronically late and thus, we were often late. Not for the school BUS (if you miss it, it is not coming back!). But when my dad drove us, we were late sometimes. Still, school was obviously very important, the most important thing, whether or not we were tardy now and then.
September 4th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
The bus was running late. It’s the beginning of the year and they’re working out the kinks and the busses are late. In fact, this post could have been written about me yesterday - I was standing outside with my son waiting for the bus, which came at 8:25 even though the school day starts at 8:15. Glad no one reported me!
September 4th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
Michael,
I thought by this:
“It’s also possible that this is an isolated incident and that this mom is just having a bad day. All I know is that school started last week and this lady’s daughter is already going to be tardy.”
I left room for the possibility that it wasn’t a recurring theme in this woman’s life.
September 4th, 2008 at 1:22 pm
JLP–Your kids have NEVER been late to school? Come on…You must be in the top .000001% of society then. I bet kids in Japan and China are even late once in 8 years! : )
September 4th, 2008 at 1:29 pm
James,
Unless I don’t know about it, my kids have never been late to school.
September 4th, 2008 at 1:30 pm
Wow… when I read these posts it is using possible examples to demonstrate a point. The post is really being about a certain point, not that particular situation.
My preacher at church uses examples all the time to make a point; many times that particular situation may not have been enough to cause that judgment but made for a good way to discuss the issue.
Can people start making a comment on the issues not the single incident?
I do wonder how this compares to what occurs in other countries, personally I am becoming worried about where our education is heading.
September 4th, 2008 at 1:45 pm
Philip,
I think it’s my combative writing style that makes people take offense at some of my posts.
I didn’t necessarily mean to pick on this one woman but seeing her standing out there with her daughter did make me think about tardiness and how it sets a bad example for students.
September 4th, 2008 at 2:03 pm
fyi — we don’t have the problem in Japan because unless you commute by train (private school), we all walk to school. At one school, students walked for more than 30 minutes to get to school.
September 4th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
I agree with Michael. I enjoyed the blog when it was about personal finance. The food stamp post and this one just seem to be a forum for judging others without even knowing or speaking to them. And I’m not buying the ‘disclaimer’ statement about it being a bad day.
Good luck Mr. Perfect.
September 4th, 2008 at 3:08 pm
In elementary school my area didn’t have a school bus. So starting in 3rd grade I biked to school myself. Needless to say I was often late. I can’t say it hurt my future education to miss 1 hour of 3rd grade.
September 4th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
I remember being late a few times for school but it really was only a few times. If there’s a long line of kids that are tardy it might have something to do with the parents but it might also have something to do with the school itself. I am inclined to agree that people are placing less importance on the school system I think part of that problem lies with school systems (in general) that aren’t providing our children the level of schooling that they need.
When I was in high school some of my friends had siblings in grade school they were learning things in grades 6, 7 and 8 that I had covered off in much earlier grades. A lot of people pushed the idea of ‘No Child left behind’ where everything becomes very watered down and there is no punishment or disciplining for poor results. Unfortunately I think that these types of programs are stupid and loose any form of impact after a certain age. Our world is competitive and you don’t get by, by being average.
While your specific example might not apply I do believe that Western Culture has put too little emphasis on schooling. Look at what India has achieved in half a century; but people only complain about the jobs they lost not bothering to improve their educational situation or their children’s.
September 4th, 2008 at 4:57 pm
Scratching my chin wondering what the heck this post has to do with “financial matters.”
But, then, I am a Bozo.
September 4th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
I appreciate what you are trying to say in your post and yes, education should be important, but get off your soap box to say it. Blanket statements like this: “There was no reason for this other than their parents just couldn’t get them to school on time.” are all to aften proven wrong. Did you ask if the bus was late, had a flat tire, got stuck behind a train? Was their a grandparent breakfast, a boy scout breakfast which often start at 7? Or is it just easier for you to look down from your high and mighty post?
September 4th, 2008 at 5:55 pm
JLP,
Stick to FINANCE topics and you’ll be fine. At times your posts sound like whatever is brewing in your head. Keep up the good, finance-related topics.
Cheers,
Jim
September 4th, 2008 at 6:46 pm
I’ve been late to school with my daughter a few times in the past seven years. Suddenly I feel like such a failure as a dad…I’m amazed that she’s still able to be an honor student.
September 4th, 2008 at 6:53 pm
I guess I’m on my own on this one.
Dan,
I was referring to the habitual late people, not the “every-once-in-a-while” late people. Obviously there are circumstances out of people’s control.
Anyway, I guess that’s what I get for sharing my opinion…
September 4th, 2008 at 8:55 pm
Nothing like a controversial article or two to get the readers to participate!
I agree that it was a little judgemental on your part.
September 5th, 2008 at 10:10 am
I agree with the other posters that this was judgemental of you. Is that the role you are setting for your children? To judge a person and their circumstances just by looking at them once?
September 5th, 2008 at 11:51 am
wow. youre making broad, sweeping assumptions about some stranger that you know absolutely nothing about. youre judging someone based on some perception you invented about what their lives are like ( basically in comparison to your own). weird. why not worry about your own life instead of getting on some high horse about neighbors wearing bathrobes.
September 5th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
I too make only Correct decisions in life, so I understand where JLP is coming from! My children have been attending school for 14 years and have also never been late - due to my traditional conservative American work ethic and general superiority to those who make poor life decisions. I often enjoy shaking my head in quiet judgment of people my friends and I refer to behind closed doors as “the problem” with our society! I feel secure in the knowledge that it was my hard work and determination, and by no means my class circumstances, that gave me what I have in life! We’re all on an equal playing field here right?! Whether we descend from a legacy of abuse and misfortune or not - we should all heed the story of Horatio Alger, and pull ourselves up from our bootstraps regardless of our situation! Next time I am bemoaning the welfare state this country has become, and before I change the topic to our crumbling education system(tell those inferior parents to get their children in school for Pete’s sake!)…I’ll tip a hat to this blog for having the courage to shed some light on the insecure, judgemental and constantly frightened dialouge that runs like a stock ticker through my mind! Cheers to you, JLP!
September 5th, 2008 at 2:52 pm
Josh,
Thank you so much for setting me straight with that witty little comment. You really put me in my place!
September 5th, 2008 at 3:14 pm
Hmmmm…
Seems to me that many readers (and several respected national publications) appreciate the bulk of the personal finance material that JLP has written over several years on this blog. That’s quite an accomplishment! Then he goes off, however, and makes two mistakes in the past few weeks (i.e, “food stamps” and “sad sight”) and suddenly everyone is bent out of shape. (Yes, JLP, they were mistakes my friend.)
It’s right to point out his errors. JLP invites such feedback by encouraging comments from his readers. By all means state your opinions.
However, “listen” to the tone of the comments in these two posts and note that a fair number (but not all) of them are as harsh and judgemental of JLP as he is accused of being in these two instances. Some are even more so!
Is is possible that some of you preaching tolerance and grace (and rightly so) are exhibiting neither in dealing with JLP? I think so.
Give JLP the same breaks you expect him to give others. Consider the entire body of his work on this blog. I think you’ll see that he’s not the monster you imagine. He screwed up a few times but that’s no reason to crucify him. Point out to JLP his mistakes in the same manner you’d want someone to approach you if YOU screwed up.
Reminds me of a verse:
“Bretheren, even if a man is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, lest you too be tempted.”
Maybe if we all took this to heart the world might be a better place.
September 5th, 2008 at 10:37 pm
I too enjoy making snap judgements based on no information.
September 5th, 2008 at 10:42 pm
I get it Jim.
September 6th, 2008 at 9:07 am
September 6th, 2008 at 9:50 pm
I was walking to work earlier today, and a driver who was talking on her cell phone did not yield at the designated pedestrian crossing. She just drove by and didn’t acknowledge my presence. The outrage! Cell phones should be banned! They probably don’t have that problem in China, Japan, Tunisia, or Luxemburg (insert random country here).
I was on a bus a few days ago. There were at least 20 passengers but I was the only one reading a book. Ye gods! That means only 5% of our nation are literate! Aaaaaaah! Those illiterate idiots! I bet they don’t have them in
Earlier today I walked past a young man whose shoes were untied. What does that say about our nation’s priorities? If all Americans walk with their shoes untied, there will be disasters, accidents and catastrophes all over the place! Something needs to be done now!!
…
Do you see how strange, self-righteous and borderline paranoid it sounds when other people use your line of thinking? Yes, I may have used the ad absurdo just a wee bit, but I hope I made my point. JLP, you are a good PF blogger. Please don’t switch gears and become a run-of-the-mill preacher.
September 8th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
I agree with you! School is important. Get your kids out there on time. She may have been having a bad day and she may not have been.
September 8th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
Funny to read all these posts and listen to everyone correct the blogger. I believe the site is the bloggers? Maybe I’m wrong, doubtful. Even though it states that this is a personal finance blog I don’t believe that other topics can’t be posted. I didn’t pay for information on this site, did any of you? I don’t get why the individual paying for the site shouldn’t be able to put WHATEVER thought comes to mind up here. Funny how all of the comments, for the most part, are just trying to put JLP in his place for having his OWN thoughts on a subject. I wish so badly that I could be like all the commenters, for the most part, on this site and have such great insight and wisdom!!! I bet all those upset posters would love it if someone came in and told them how to run their website/business/home/life!!!
September 8th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
Nothing like a bit of controversy to stir the comment pot